God knows we need help, especially in a relationship that’s as precious as marriage. Marriage deals with children, generations and legacy. In a relationship as precious as marriage, God knows that we need help, and so He gave us help. Genesis 2 tells us what He says about that help and where that help comes from.
“Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him’” (Gen. 2:18).
That’s right; two are needed. God brings a helper to help men in their perspective.
Paul was single and he says, “I want you to be free from concern.”
“… one who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord; but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how he may please his wife, and his interests are divided …” (1 Cor. 7:32-34).
He is saying if you get married, you will have challenges. Some have been given the gift of marriage.
There are some that are supposed to be single. They are fine being single and they don’t want to be married. Now, if you have a gift of singleness, then the Bible says you should have undistracted devotion to the Lord. The ones that are unmarried and have a gift of singleness in this church should be some of the best of the best in giving in the areas of ministry and leading, because God says you have an undistracted devotion to the Lord.
There are some that are single for a season and they’re fine during that season. Then the season comes to an end and then they want to be married. So others are single as a gift for their life; others, for a season and even others have a gift to be married.
God is saying the main thing is that you have an undistracted devotion to the Lord. But married people, you’ll have to work a little bit harder.
Keep an Open Heart
Some people say, “What if I get married and I think I made a mistake?”
Once you say, “I do,” it becomes God’s will for you to be married.
If you are willing to repent and start fresh, God will change everything. That which would have been a gift of singleness is now a gift of marriage. He’s a miracle-working God. Let Him go and change hearts; He is able to. If you are willing to change and a miracle is needed, God can do the miracle.
Healing Your Marriage is God’s Best Option
“He said to them, ‘Because of your hardness of heart, Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning, it has not been this way’” (Matt. 19:8).
God’s first and best option is healing your marriage, but both people need to be willing. It requires both; that’s why it’s very important to keep your marriage supple. It’s going to require maintenance, a lot of maintenance.
You’ve got to maintain your marriage early on and when the troubles and challenges start, resolve them. Set your heart to resolve every single one and don’t let it go underground and start a sewer system in your marriage. Resolve every single one that you can.
Provisions for Remarriage
When a spouse dies, permission is given to remarry. It’s death from natural causes.
“A wife is bound as long as her husband lives; but if her husband is dead, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord” (1 Cor. 7:39).
There are obvious reasons when a spouse dies and every single one of us will have to face that possibility.
If your husband is an unbelieving person but he consents to live with you, then that’s fine. Just make him your mission field, pray for him and adorn yourself with all the character qualities and the disposition of a woman of God. The same applies for an unbelieving wife.
On the other hand, if that person chooses to leave you and abdicates his responsibilities as a husband and a father, then you are free to remarry, but only in the Lord. God’s Word protects and gives provision to someone who would become victimized the rest of his or her life because of abandonment.
Unfaithfulness is sexual infidelity or adultery. If you don’t like your spouse so you divorce him or her to marry another, that is a heart issue, not a legal issue. God gives some freedom to remarry, but only in the Lord.
God’s Best: Do Life By the Book
Make sure that you’re following God’s will because all of us are part of the fallen human nature and we’ve made mistakes. Genuinely repent. Ask God for a new beginning.
God wants to counsel us and that’s why our daily devotions are so important. If you’re a single person, whether it’s a gift of singleness or you’re in a season of singleness or you’re looking to be married, make sure you’re in the Word of God. Let God instruct you and teach you and counsel you before you get tested with temptation, before you make decisions that are erroneous.
The above article by Pastor Wayne Cordeiro is a repost from the Mentoring Leaders storehouse.