Ways to Soothe Disputes

Family feuds are a part of life. They involve people who were once amiable, but who are now somewhat antagonistic and miles apart. These feuds are sometimes caused by major breakdowns, but more often, they are caused by cuts and scrapes that become infected.

Never Underestimate Minor Tribulations

How many relationships have been broken because of a minor and often foolish problem?

An untrue rumor, miscommunication, a misperception and someone’s immaturity are minor problems that have the potential to destroy our relationships. We are all immature to one level or another. Ironically, we can overcome the biggest battle but die climbing the smallest hill.

Turning Mistakes into Miracles

“Therefore, we do not lose heart … for our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (2 Cor. 4:16-18).

Momentary life afflictions will produce a glorious change in us far beyond our comprehension. If we learn how to correctly handle cuts and bruises, we will develop valuable character qualities we need in life.

Learning how to change mistakes into miracles can affect our entire life. We need to realize how to take care of our cuts and bruises by ourselves because we cannot gain wisdom by allowing someone else to do our homework for us. If we do, we are shortchanging ourselves and undermining what God has planned for us to experience.

Sources of Cuts and Bruises

Words and Actions that are Intentional — This occurs when someone purposely wants to cut you. Retaliation is also classified under this category.

Words and Actions that are Unintentional — These types of cuts and bruises occur when someone would say something with no intentions to hurt you, but you still feel the pain and are offended by the comment.

Self-Inflicted — Self-inflicted cuts and bruises are the worst and most dangerous types. A self-inflicted cut is when someone says something and you add a meaning to it that wasn’t intended for the comment to have.

How do we rise above these cuts and bruises so they don’t become destructive? What’s God’s remedy?

“Therefore, we do not lose heart” (2 Cor. 4:16).

God’s Remedy:

    1. Guard Your Heart

“Above all else, guard your heart, for it affects everything you do” (Prov. 4:23).

The condition of your heart is incredibly important because it will affect everything you do. You program and build your heart. That’s why God tells you that the most important thing about you is your heart and not your performance. If God can obtain your heart, then it’ll affect everything else in your life. If you allow God to correct and adjust your heart, it will affect the way you see, speak, act and respond in this world.

    1. Ask for and Apply Wisdom

“If you need wisdom—if you want to know what God wants you to do, ask Him—and He will gladly tell you” (James 1:5).

He’ll instruct us, but we have to ask for it and apply wisdom. Wisdom is when God shows and helps us to see things the way He sees them. God will reveal to us how He would respond and how He would speak if He was in the same situation.

Now, it’s still a choice we have to make. He’ll show us how He sees and how He would define the situation, but we still have to make a choice — whether we agree with wisdom or choose to reject it.

If we choose to agree with wisdom, we have to correct our hearts and change our perspective. Instead of saying what we would like to say, we will correct our words and say what Jesus would say. When we choose wisdom and apply it, we will become someone who will be growing in wisdom. We will start to see things the way God sees it; we will define things the way God defines them. We will start to do things as the Lord would do them. We will have the same perspective as He would have.

He’s changing our hearts.

Ask God for and apply wisdom and you’ll begin to see the cuts and bruises as something that becomes a classroom of character rather than a torturer that would cause misery. It can be the beginning of a miracle rather than the end of it if you choose not to be offended. 

  1. Fix Your Sights on What’s Eternal

“So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (2 Cor. 4:18).

Once we focus our eyes on what God is doing, we will begin to look more like the person God intended us to become. However, if we fix our eyes on the problem, we will become more like the problem.

When you get caught up in the cuts and bruises, it may be God’s way of reminding us that our eyes have been focused too much on the temporal objects in life. We look not on the seen, but that which is unseen. For that which is seen is passing; that which is unseen is your destiny.

The above article by Pastor Wayne Cordeiro is a repost from the Mentoring Leaders storehouse.

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